[NSFW] STUPID MONSTER SEXPOCALYPSES

[cawnviction]

HERE IS CROW, WHO YOU APPARENTLY WANT TO BANG FOR SOME REASON. WITH ALL YOUR ADDITIONAL APPENDAGES/POWERS, HOW WRONG CAN IT GO?

Also general gore warning on top of the NSFW warning because this is all about Bad Monster Ideas.

If you want to play it out monster sex going wrong, but not in a public manner, please post a blank comment and I'll screen it, which will cause the rest of the thread to be screened.


Things that have Gone Wrong (including threads in other peoples' museboxes):
- Crow getting his dick stuck in holes that are too small and rigid
- Crow literally breaking someone's ass
- Condoms and the equivalent of blood getting stuck inside Crow's genital slit
- Crow getting his mouth burned and ice cream stuck in the lower jaw of his whale mask
- Crow getting his tail burned
- Crow getting his dick ripped off (blowjobs going wrong in the worst way) before getting killed
- Crow killing someone via blowjob
- Crow getting a too hot dick up his ass

Comments

well now he's EXTREMELY dead

[cawnviction]

[Crow's eyes are closed, completely unaware of Shulk's predicament as euphoria thrums through his entire body, tingling energy seeping from his spine to the very tips of his fingers. He can't stop, won't stop.

Crow lifts his head off Shulk, arching and letting out a shuddering moan as he comes inside the harpy.

Then he looks down. Sees the shrivelled body on the bed, feathers lifelessly splayed out on the sheets. Sees the dried up fig of a penis he'd been sucking just moments earlier. Crow lets out a horrified (and disgusted) shriek, hurriedly pulling out and clamping his hands over his mouth before he draws any more attention to the room.]

Oh crap.

[Did he just... He just killed Shulk by giving him a blowjob. Damn it! He should've just stuck to hands and anal! This is just like when he kissed that unconscious guy in some back alley with Yusei!

Oh no. Yusei. What's he going to tell Yusei? "Sorry, your boyfriend cheated on you with me and I accidentally killed him?" That's gonna go down well. He can't believe he didn't notice what was happening to Shulk, too! Crow drags a hand down his face. Also he just got off in a dead guy's ass!! Disgusted, Crow pulls the condom off his dick, which returns to its usual place inside his genital slit.]

What the hell am I gonna do?

[He can't just leave Shulk here for some poor sod to discover. But he can't just lug a sack of skin and bones around with him, and the idea of dumping what's left of Shulk into the trash doesn't sit well with him.

Wait, don't these places usually have a bag for laundry?

Crow practically leaps off the bed and yanks open the doors to the wardrobe. Perfect. Striding back to the bed, Crow unceremoniously shoves Shulk's clothes and corpse into the laundry bag and ties it into a knot. Crow dresses himself in a hurry before unlatching the window and shoving it open. Time to make his getaway.

...He hopes Rin doesn't mind something less meaty for his soup kitchen.]