cawnviction | [NSFW] STUPID MONSTER SEXPOCALYPSES

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[NSFW] STUPID MONSTER SEXPOCALYPSES

HERE IS CROW, WHO YOU APPARENTLY WANT TO BANG FOR SOME REASON. WITH ALL YOUR ADDITIONAL APPENDAGES/POWERS, HOW WRONG CAN IT GO?

Also general gore warning on top of the NSFW warning because this is all about Bad Monster Ideas.

If you want to play it out monster sex going wrong, but not in a public manner, please post a blank comment and I'll screen it, which will cause the rest of the thread to be screened.

Things that have Gone Wrong (including threads in other peoples' museboxes):
- Crow getting his dick stuck in holes that are too small and rigid
- Crow literally breaking someone's ass
- Condoms and the equivalent of blood getting stuck inside Crow's genital slit
- Crow getting his mouth burned and ice cream stuck in the lower jaw of his whale mask
- Crow getting his tail burned
- Crow getting his dick ripped off (blowjobs going wrong in the worst way) before getting killed
- Crow killing someone via blowjob
- Crow getting a too hot dick up his ass

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Sex. That sure was a seemingly innocent word that Roxas wanted to explore. After several conversations, the harpy had made his way to the library to read on the subject of sex and sexuality, but reading was very... safe. He wanted to try what he'd read about. He had also read that it should be with someone you trust. So, here he was, at Crow's, debating how to word this question.

"I wanted to ask you something," he ventured, eyes anywhere but on the mer. Why was this so difficult? And why had he never heard anything about sex before coming here to Ryslig? The books made it seem so normal...

"I want to have sex," he finally blurted out, forcing himself to look his friend in the eyes. Every action with conviction, after all.

When Crow opened his door to Roxas and let him inside to talk, that would have been one of the last things he'd expected to come out of Roxas' mouth.

"Uh," he says, very eloquently.

Crow blinks, bewildered. Give him a second, because that question totally blindsided him. Okay. Right.

"What prompted this?" Crow's expression shifts back into his usual smile. "Do you have someone you like? Need help getting them in the sack? Is that why you're asking?"

A frustrated huff blew from his mouth. "No, I was asking you because I trust you. That's what the books said to do..." Wow he probably sounded incredibly desperate right now, taking instructions from a book on something like this. But life didn't come with an instruction manual, so what was he supposed to do exactly?

"I want to have sex... with you," he clarified, forcing his nerves down, though he'd averted his eyes once more. His hands were clenched at his sides, claws tapping nervously at his palms. "Because I trust you."

...Oh.

Crow scratches the back of his head. He's not uncomfortable per se, but it sure is completely out of left field.

"Not something I thought I'd be hearing when I opened the door tonight." Crow lets out an amused huff, hands going to his hips. "So you're curious and want to try things. I don't have a problem with it. Buuut..." Crow gives Roxas a look up and down, the ridge over one of his eyes rising. "Did you bring any protection?"

As much as Roxas wants to apologize for putting Crow in this position, he pushes that urge down. This was something he wanted, and he wouldn't do Crow the disservice of wembling about it. Besides, it didn't seem like Crow was going to be backing down, so why should Roxas?

"Protection?" He asked blankly, not because he didn't know what it was, but because he didn't see why they would need that. "I don't think you can get me pregnant." That's what protection was for, according to the books. Roxas was male, Crow was male. What was the worry?

Crow makes a Face at that. Man, who's in charge of the sex ed for all these guys? He thought Naomi took care of that! But this isn't the first time he's had to deal with a guy wanting to have sex with him thinking protection is only for pregnancies. Crow gets the sinking feeling it isn't going to be the last, either...

He shakes his head. "Protection's also for preventing diseases that are spread through sex."

Crow lets out a sigh. Sure he's been sleeping around, but on others' invitation, so he never had to bring any of his own. They're gonna have to make a trip to the shops, aren't they?

"Did you bring lube as well?"

May as well figure out if they need to buy that, too.

Unfortunately for Crow and Roxas both, the book had very little to say on same-sex relations. It had focused solely on opposite-sex couplings, and even then they were human only. Not that any of this had occurred to Roxas. What could the difference possibly be? Two bodies, one goal. What did it matter what they had in their pants?

Well, a lot, apparently.

"I'm not diseased." The harpy huffed in annoyance at all the questions. It was time to take matters into his own claws. Taking a deep breath to reset himself, he took a few steps closer to Crow, smiling innocently.

"We don't need all of that stuff," he cooed, voice taking on a very different pitch and tone with some soft undertones. "Let's just do it. I trust you, Crow." As he spoke, he lifted a wing to caress Crow's cheek with the back of a claw, looking him in the eyes to make sure he had his full attention.

"But--"

Why is not having protection or lube a problem? Crow can't remember the reason, especially when Roxas runs a claw down his cheek, and coherent thought flies out the window.

Crow visibly swallows, mouth opening and closing a few times as he tries to say something in protest and fails. He tries to look away, but he can't, caught under Roxas' thrall.

"I." A small part of him is still resisting the charming, banging on the wall in his mind in an attempt to be heard. "Something's not... right..."

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