cawnviction | [NSFW] STUPID MONSTER SEXPOCALYPSES

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[NSFW] STUPID MONSTER SEXPOCALYPSES

HERE IS CROW, WHO YOU APPARENTLY WANT TO BANG FOR SOME REASON. WITH ALL YOUR ADDITIONAL APPENDAGES/POWERS, HOW WRONG CAN IT GO?

Also general gore warning on top of the NSFW warning because this is all about Bad Monster Ideas.

If you want to play it out monster sex going wrong, but not in a public manner, please post a blank comment and I'll screen it, which will cause the rest of the thread to be screened.

Things that have Gone Wrong (including threads in other peoples' museboxes):
- Crow getting his dick stuck in holes that are too small and rigid
- Crow literally breaking someone's ass
- Condoms and the equivalent of blood getting stuck inside Crow's genital slit
- Crow getting his mouth burned and ice cream stuck in the lower jaw of his whale mask
- Crow getting his tail burned
- Crow getting his dick ripped off (blowjobs going wrong in the worst way) before getting killed
- Crow killing someone via blowjob
- Crow getting a too hot dick up his ass

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[Wow Shulk. Talk about I M P A T I E N T. Quit waving your dick in front of his face, Crow gets the idea already, geez! If Shulk's not careful, he's going to get it caught on the teeth of Crow's mask, now that would be a real tragedy.

Though admittedly, Crow can't wipe the grin off his face; seeing Shulk get all hot and bothered sends the heat directly downwards.

But Crow can't just go straight down on Shulk; his mask would get in the way. Unless Shulk likes the sensation of a whale snout hitting his belly and teeth poking his ass, Crow's gotta do it differently. Lifting one of Shulk's legs to hook it around his hip, Crow wraps a hand around the base of Shulk's length -- even if Shulk isn't prehensile, unless he has an actual bone in there, his dick should still be flexible -- and curves it into his mouth, folding his lips over teeth.

Crow doesn't yet suck him. Instead he rolls his tongue over the tip before exploring the crease joining the head with the shaft, hips beginning to move in slow, languid thrusts, prehensile dick arcing inside Shulk to find the best position within him. Using the flat of his tongue, Crow strokes the underside of Shulk's dick before curling his tongue, lightly flicking, saliva moistening the movement between mouth and cock.

Is Crow being mildly frustrating on purpose? Maybe.]

Edited 2016-03-01 17:23 (UTC)

[Waving a dick, waving the Monado, same thing. Apparently Shulk has a habit of doing both. If it's really that troublesome, just make him hold still, Crow. You've got the strength for it!

And hey, don't knock it until you try it. Maybe teeth on your butt feels nice, somehow. The harpy isn't interested in further experimenting though, not now anyway. Crow's already doing like, mad scientist stuff here. He grunts when Crow moves his leg, pressing his ankle against the mer. Gasps when Crow grabs his poor, neglected dick, groaning when finally, there's a wet heat around it.

Of course, Crow has to be a tease. Shulk doesn't think to complain immediately though, whimpering a bit at the light touches, breaking off into a short keen when Crow's length curves inside him again. He threads his fingers in Crow's hair, brushing at the mer's scalp before gripping and tugging at handfuls or orange.

Is he expressing approval or further impatience? Who knows! Probably both.]

[Crow makes a show of allowing his hair to be pulled -- the tugging pleasant against his scalp -- lifting his head off Shulk's cock briefly to grin at him, warm breath fanning over Shulk's erection. But he's kept Shulk waiting long enough, soon going down on the harpy, this time using his lips and mouth to fully envelop the head of Shulk's penis, finally sucking in earnest, hips rolling as he moves his own dick in and out of Shulk's ass.

Unknown to Crow, he begins to drain water from Shulk, shivering in pleasure that rocks him from spine all the way down to his tail. Spurred on, Crow takes more of Shulk's length into his mouth, sucking harder, tongue tracing Shulk's barbs before curling around the shaft and stroking as Crow bobs his head to an even rhythm in time with his thrusts.]

[Shulk purses his lips at that cheeky grin, a veritable pout, but it's all he can muster, letting his head slam back against the mattress as Crow continues.

The harpy trills from the pleasure that hits him in waves, hips rolling time with Crow's, the attention to his cock and the press of the mer inside him making him writhe, pulling at the mer's hair like it's a lifeline.

At least, that's how it is at first. The high that was building starts to wane...he feels oddly tired, thirstier when Crow gets more enthusiastic. Which the harried pace is nice, still, but the harpy licks at dry lips. His hold on Crow's hair slackens then, and he'd lift his head, say something is wrong, but he can't. Tries, before flopping uselessly. Struck by sudden weakness and dizziness in tandem, and all he can do is croak weakly. His head is pounding.

Something...something's not right, is the brief thought his brain musters, Shulk staring up at the ceiling. His eyes start to burn.]

[The more Crow sucks, the more he wants to keep going. Which isn't unusual in itself, but...

Crow lets out a deep rumble from the back of his throat, closing his eyes and taking in the rest of Shulk's dick into his mouth, his entire body shuddering as euphoria rushes over him from head all the way down to his tail. His thrusts into the harpy grow frantic, invigorating energy practically thrumming through his veins the more he continues.

Crow doesn't notice anything wrong. How can he, when all he's aware of is pleasure hitting him in waves, crushing all semblance of thought under it?

Even if he did, Crow's too far gone to even consider something as silly as stopping.]

[Shulk's ears are ringing, and the light above hurts his eyes terribly, and his clarity of thought is swallowed in confusion and terror -- he doesn't understand why Crow doesn't seem to notice. He just keeps going as if everything is fine. Shouldn't he recognize his partner in this is awfully silent? Near unresponsive?

The harpy doesn't feel pleasure anymore, only pain. Skin pulled thin and taut, muscles locking up from dehydration.

It's agony.

He can't even scream, only wheeze. His body isn't working anymore, and his tongue feels like cotton in his mouth. He blinks, closes his mouth to keep some moisture in but his lips stick together and he doesn't have the strength to open it again.

It's hard to tell when he passes. But it's quiet.]

[Crow's eyes are closed, completely unaware of Shulk's predicament as euphoria thrums through his entire body, tingling energy seeping from his spine to the very tips of his fingers. He can't stop, won't stop.

Crow lifts his head off Shulk, arching and letting out a shuddering moan as he comes inside the harpy.

Then he looks down. Sees the shrivelled body on the bed, feathers lifelessly splayed out on the sheets. Sees the dried up fig of a penis he'd been sucking just moments earlier. Crow lets out a horrified (and disgusted) shriek, hurriedly pulling out and clamping his hands over his mouth before he draws any more attention to the room.]

Oh crap.

[Did he just... He just killed Shulk by giving him a blowjob. Damn it! He should've just stuck to hands and anal! This is just like when he kissed that unconscious guy in some back alley with Yusei!

Oh no. Yusei. What's he going to tell Yusei? "Sorry, your boyfriend cheated on you with me and I accidentally killed him?" That's gonna go down well. He can't believe he didn't notice what was happening to Shulk, too! Crow drags a hand down his face. Also he just got off in a dead guy's ass!! Disgusted, Crow pulls the condom off his dick, which returns to its usual place inside his genital slit.]

What the hell am I gonna do?

[He can't just leave Shulk here for some poor sod to discover. But he can't just lug a sack of skin and bones around with him, and the idea of dumping what's left of Shulk into the trash doesn't sit well with him.

Wait, don't these places usually have a bag for laundry?

Crow practically leaps off the bed and yanks open the doors to the wardrobe. Perfect. Striding back to the bed, Crow unceremoniously shoves Shulk's clothes and corpse into the laundry bag and ties it into a knot. Crow dresses himself in a hurry before unlatching the window and shoving it open. Time to make his getaway.

...He hopes Rin doesn't mind something less meaty for his soup kitchen.]

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